Skip to main content

That continuous Metamorphosis

Considering that this year has been a lot about motherhood for me, it had to be a year of intense connection. While that experience with my son and husband has been a chapter by itself, what needed more time and energy was realizing the need and beauty of a profound disconnect.


I never worked well with the concept of disconnect. Was it because I did not learn how to build boundaries too well? – Let’s just say that I did not learn to draw them well and my parents probably still don’t know that there is an option to do so.


Celebrating bonds, emotions and heavily investing in relationships is what I’ve been conditioned to.
No – I still can’t tell myself it is any less than amazing.
Yes – I can now tell myself that not everyone can understand or feel the same way.


If the idea of needing to “disconnect” at times sounds ridiculous, or even mean-spirited, I want to assure you that isn’t my intent at all. In my own life too, I have been the one that was disconnected from. It does hurt, but when I started accepting that it really isn’t about me, as much as that the other person needs it in order to move on in their life, it helps immensely.
As the old saying goes, “there’s my story, then there’s your story, and often, somewhere in the middle is the truth.” So it isn’t necessarily about anyone being the bad guy.


I look back at the many lovely people who I walked with
and then had to go different ways – I’m sorry if I did not make moving on easy for you. I hope we are all in better spaces now.
I look around at the ones who believe they are walking with me but actually only has the time for my “I’m fine” to their occasional “how are you”. I hope you understand why it is important for me or anyone to be in a space where there is the exchange of energy than a one way drain of energy.
I look eye to eye at the ones who let my conditioning of celebrating bonds and investing heavily in relations look good.
I look forward to strong relationships that come with equal strength from both parties to sustain it.


This year with motherhood, I am constantly asked about how I feel about leaving Neil when I go to work or if I miss him. Neil is undoubtedly the most wholesome experience of my life – he has come in pushing my boundaries (or did I push him!), reminding me of who I am and what I may be capable of and giving a stronger urge to be better and stay healthy.


Being his mother is so lovely and it will forever be difficult for me to explain exactly what it encapsulates. But I hope to live a life where he is always aware and grows to respect the individual that Glynn is. That intense connection I feel with him is only complete when there is a profound disconnect in my opinion – a healthy space for him and myself to breathe, grow and look up to each other as individuals.


Re-condition  |  Un-learn  |  Dis-connect

Comments

  1. This is such a great post Glynn!My favourite is the last line. I go back to the days when I put a thought about disconnect during my bad days and realised how important it is to just,be.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Holding hands through changing contexts

 A few years ago, my two friends and I bonded over snacks and chat during our recess at school. Each of us struggled with different types of math problems, we had different dreams to chase, and we struggled with different challenges. Then one day we took off to different places to chase our dreams. Of course, we made promises to stay in touch; we shed tears because we thought we can’t live without each other, and we made our parents promise us national roaming plans so that we could talk our hearts out. Fast forward – more than a decade later - multiple milestones, wins, and falls later – we three managed to transcend and keep it together. Technology nurtured our bond and it worked fine. Then one day, we decided to take some time to catch up in person in another country. It was a dream and fortunately, it was simply beautiful. On reflecting upon my experience of being part of a close group for so many years, I penned down a few things before and after the trip – BEFORE When we ...

Motion in Emotion - It is for a reason

Over the years, I have observed that doing extraordinary things is sometimes a little easier than doing the ordinary and necessary. We often deliver projects well or achieve more than our target for the month but would not have managed to make our bed, cook our meal or take a walk. In the literal sense, extraordinary is that which needs a little extra but looks like we're living in a time where the extra is what the ordinary tasks require.  Over the last decade, health has been a portfolio where I've tried to invest consistently. My personal experiences within the family, watching some near one's bargain for more time and witnessing some hitting the finish line, have been growing on me steadily. Even in the most casual conversations, when I hear a statement or comment where the body and life we have is taken for granted, it gets me restless and sad.  I always embraced routine and the ordinary. It genuinely helps me even through the days when my extraordinary plans don't...

Life lessons from everyday things – By the sink

Off late, there is so much banter around the heat. This year, the summer has pushed us all to sweat it out without having to really sweat it out. After every such conversation, I think of the summers while I was growing up. I mean, we grew up in the Middle East so the “we know how hot it can get” sort of attitude does come across subtly!  These seasons change the nitty-gritty of our everyday life in such a significant manner, though we don’t really notice most of it. The summer was harsh where we grew up – like so hot. We were privileged enough to not experience the brunt of it with the comfort of moving into air-conditioned facilities. However, some things screamed summer and made life difficult. Picture this: exposed pipes running through our house like fiery serpents, heating up the water as it made its way from tank to tap. It's like the water itself was trying to stage a rebellion against our attempts to stay cool. The time it stays in the pipeline, it just heated up all the m...